I first heard about Ashley Madison a while back, when a new client told me that she had proof that her husband was repeatedly cheating on her as a result of numerous charges from Ashley Madison and random hotels to their credit cards. I went home that day and researched more about Ashley Madison and to my surprise, there was this website motivating people to find new and exciting adventures outside of their committed relationship. The most surprising factor was that the website was targeting individuals in a committed relationship. I read reviews about the website and articles about it. The website offers different level subscriptions, from which their ultimate level (the most expensive one) warranties that you find a match to go outside your boring routine and into an exciting adventure with an individual who you don’t have to see ever again, for a monthly charge. More so, they warranty confidentiality of their activities.
The fact that a credit card charge will be on record is already a sign that the activities can be traced. Today, the big news is that Ashley Madison’s site was hacked, leaving 37 million profiles open to be exposed.
In my opinion Ashley Madison is like any drug dealer, bookie, or gambling entity (some legal and other illegal depending on where you live) that prey on the vulnerabilities of individuals to make a profit. Drug dealers take advantage of individuals with poor coping skills who struggle with internal suffering by using drugs to mask their feelings. Ashley Madison is a “services” that connect individuals who want to ignore their own issues or problems in their relationship by focusing on meeting new people who are also escaping from their problems, all while making a profit.
What happened today is merely a consequence to their actions. I can’t say that i’m not glad that this happened, because I see the pain and destruction that Ashley Madison can bring to the life of many individuals who choose to involve in this kind of activity, to their spouse and ultimately their family. Keep in mind that Ashley Madison is not a new concept, anyone can meet other individuals who are looking to hook up for the night no strings attached, but eventually it takes time and effort to continue doing this. Ashley Madison made it very simple to arrange encounters of this type with little effort, other than your credit card information.
Hopefully the individuals at risk of being exposed can use this opportunity to choose honesty (which otherwise may come if they’re exposed) and address the motivations that have lead them to seek a double life.
Affairs and infidelities can be motivated by a number of different reasons, such as depression, anxiety, life changes, a need for excitement, as ego booster, in an effort to cope with stress, low self esteem, past abuse and more. Addressing these areas will cause less damage than choosing to have an affair. Therapy is a way to address all of these areas in a safe environment, so if you’re struggling with any of these, seeking professional help can prevent you from making poor choices for yourself and your family.