6 Common Mistakes People Make when Considering Couples Therapy

1. My insurance will provide a therapist. While insurance companies will provide a referral for you within their network, they may not be the best fit for you. Other aspects to take into consideration when using your insurance company are: Breach of confidentiality of your records. Insurance companies require access to your records for audits purposes or if they’re challenging …

Is Love Enough?

In my work with couples I’m often faced with this question, and unfortunately, love is not enough to maintain a relationship. Love can motivate actions or motivate you to work on a relationship, but to maintain a relationship takes two motivated individuals. Have you ever ended a relationship even though you loved that person? Have you been in a relationship …

How can you get through the holiday stress without killing your spouse?

  The holidays are a happy time for all, but holiday stress can influence the likelihood of entering into arguments with your significant other. The pressures of attending parties or organizing your own, in addition to everyday responsibilities can make it difficult to get along with others. It may seem like all of the responsibility is on you, and you wish …

Ashley Madison

I first heard about Ashley Madison a while back, when a new client told me that she had proof that her husband was repeatedly cheating on her as a result of numerous charges from Ashley Madison and random hotels to their credit cards. I went home that day and researched more about Ashley Madison and to my surprise, there was …

Are your actions in your relationship helping you or hurting you?

We all want to be special to our partner- to feel important, to be desired, ultimately to be loved and secured. These needs can lead us to do or say many irrational things such as fighting, pursuit, insult and even bullying a partner which ultimately damages the relationship and decreases the chances of feeling loved and secure. We can work …

12 Reasons relationships do not work out

Do all relationships have to work out? I’m often faced with this question in one form of another in my work with couples. As a couple’s therapist I would like to be able to help every couple that comes to me asking for help. The truth is that it’s not always the case. Here are some common reasons relationships do …

6 Tips to become a better listener in your relationship

One of the major causes that couples seek professional help for is their difficulty communicating, especially listening.  This prevents couples from understanding each other and, even more importantly, from solving problems or compromising.  Therefore, the same problems keep coming up time after time. I want to clarify that most people do not learn to listen effectively.  We usually learn how …

High Expectations?

Often times we have expectations about others, the world, and ourselves.  Expectations for ourselves can help us succeed and accomplish the objectives we set in life. Unfortunately, expectations can also bring much disappointment when we believe that others share our expectations or will share them in the future, but they do not or will not.  This belief can bring feelings …

Overcome Fear

In order to know how to overcome fear it’s important that we understand what it is.  Fear is a primary emotion that comes from the natural aversion to risk or threat, all humans experience this emotion. Fear is an emotion characterized by an intense feeling, usually unpleasant, caused by the perception of a threat, real or perceived, present, future or …

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is the action to let go or give up resentment, indignation or anger caused by an offense committed by another or ourselves. It’s a voluntary change of destructive behaviors directed against the damage that has been done for other more constructive. When we hurt the immediate reaction is to go against logic and who hurt us, this reaction is …